August Heat

Counting days.

Counting moments.

Counting smiles.

Counting minutes

Counting weeks.

Counting months.

Counting miles.

Counting time.

Counting hi's.

I don't want this to end.

I don't want to stop counting.

Let me stay.

April Spring

It really doesn't work like fairy tales right?

I'm still hoping.

Always,

Carmina

23rd Street Station

3 subway stops- 10 minutes, you feel like you've known each other forever.

You're waiting for the train with milk tea on hand. A tall handsome mid 20's guy approaches you. He for asks the time, he starts a conversation. You have a few laughs. You get his witty banters. He tells you, he's going to Pennsylvania to visit his mother. He's running late for the 10:45 Greyhound bus. The train comes, you removed your gloves and gave him a high five.

28th street, you tell him. "2 stops, you're gonna make it". He says, "I like your optimism".

34th street, Herald square. He asks, "What if I don't make it on time? Can I blame you and your optimism?". You say, "You can blame it all on me and hunt me down". He laughs and says "You know what, you're nice. I feel guilty I'd rather blame myself".

"I've never learned my lesson, do you ever learn yours?" He asks

"Never" You said

He has an empty suitcase that his mom likes to fill up with stuff. You think "Oh, he's interesting"

10:22 pm. He asks "Do you think I should panic now that it's 10:22?"

You say, "No. I'd rather wait until 10:25"

10:25pm- Times Square. You say, "Oh, this is my stop"

He says, "Mine too!!!!!"

"Maybe i'll see you next time at 23rd"

You just smiled and thought, "Maybe"

You don't know his name. You don't have his number. But somehow, it made your night. :)

March Breeze

Apparently, it really isn't a Hollywood movie or a fairy tale. Everything isn't what it seems to be. Somehow, someone gets hurt and not everyone is happy.

Maybe it really is time to let go.

The Staring Love Story aka Obligatory February Rant

I know I am hopeless romantic. Maybe that's why I never liked any guys who showed interest. I am waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet and meet him the most unexpected way possible.

Like now, I've always wanted to have a love story like in Hollywood movies. Meeting someone in the subway, end up liking the same stuff and hit it off. Sounds easy, right? Well, don't think so now.

Actually, I meet a few nice guys in the subway. But it was never a hollywood love story. There's always something wrong. I think i'm in my own fantasy, waiting for my superficial leading man. But like any other leading ladies, I have to forget about that fantasy.

Anyway, on to my story. I saw a potential superficial hollywood subway guy tonight. We took the 7 train at the same station. Transferred trains in the same station and ended up getting off at the same stop. We also took the same exit and walked the same road. I can see him looking back to my direction. My subway love story for tonight <3

On Commuting Part Trois

I love/hate subway rides.

I didn't like it it due to the fact that the subway lines are very confusing. Often times, I get lost. I take the wrong train and sends me off to a different direction and I hate asking for directions whenever I get lost. Also, they are freakin' slow compared to the Rail. (Yes, subways and rails are 2 different modes of transport here.. quite weird.)

Another factor is the subway is not really the cleanest place in New York. Trash everywhere, scurrying rats in the waiting area, smelly bums sleeping inside the subway car. I wouldn't eat my Dunkin' Donuts breakfast there if I were you.

Also, trains are often late or too early. Never ever rely on Google maps train schedule. Never reliable.. Trust me.

However, I also find subway rides fun. It's like a mini cultural preview of people living here. I like watching people. I like eavesdropping into conversations and using it as material for my so-called stories. I like bands trying to get discovered inside the subway and playing good folk/rock/sometimes spanish music.

I adore the pre-recorded announcement of the subway man saying, "Stand clear of the closing doors please.. ding dong".. I'm a weirdo.

I love that I learn something from listening from their conversations: from everyday work stress, to parties and awkward coffee dates, to planning a future and choosing the best colleges.

I have learned to look at the map before riding a subway so I won't get lost. I now know what north, south, east and west exits mean and how important it is to exit at the right road.

It usually gets too close, no personal space. But I've learned that if you stay by the doors, you're pretty safe from all the kili-kilis of the subway riders.

$2.50 dollars as compared to a $20 dollar cab ride makes a difference.

And actually, It's not like I have a choice. I don't have a car and having one is too expensive. It's not that bad considering I have a new crush who takes the same train as me in the mornings. So, subway it is! ;)

Amazing how we easily take the things we have for granted. Like we know that it will always be there so you never realize the importance of it anymore.

Amazing when God just answers our prayers no holds barred.

Amazing how we meet someone, instantly get a connection and feels like you've known them for so long.

...tbc. sleepy

Venting out

In all honesty, I'm not a strong person.
I was never one. Beneath my tough exterior is a fragile little girl wondering the fuck I'm doing with my life.

I hate being blamed. Especially when it's not my fault. Now i'm crying my eyes out like a pathetic baby and irritated with my stuffy nose.

I'd have to put all the worries away and watch covert affairs for a while.

New Perspective

I am happy things turned out this way.
I'm off to new possibilities. :)
I'm opening my heart now.

July heat

Sometimes, I am hoping that you admire me too.
Enough for us to be something better than friends. But most of the time, I know that the circumstances aren't right and we are better off as friends. Why waste all of that for some good lovin' right?

But for the record, yes.. You still hold a very special place in my heart.